Friday, February 29, 2008

The paperwork was just filed with the state of CO....


Had to include this shot... Todd's holding Mercer on his arm. I think I'm fond of this b/c it reminds me of my dad telling me that he was able to hold my head in his hands... and with my legs outstretched they just touched the inside of his elbow. I was smaller than Mercer 5 lbs 1 1/2 oz -- and my dad is 6'-5" so I was shorter / my dad's arms were longer.... but it's such a great picture here! Also, I love Todd's expression. He's been so great with him!

We got a call this morning saying that the paperwork went to the state agency to begin the ICPC process (Interstate Compact on the Placement of Children). Our social worker in Georgia says it will take 2 - 3 weeks before we'll be home now that the paperwork has begun. The social worker here in CO, however, says she'd be surprised if it took more than a week. Surprisingly, she works on a lot of Georgia cases (they all come from that consultant who we're working with). I think she says she's done 3 or 4 cases so far this year with adoptive parents from Atlanta... in fact, she was at the hospital yesterday with a birthmother and a couple from Atlanta who were placed with their birthmother in a timely fashion (unlike ours!)... we're so happy with where we're staying that she's trying to talk to that couple into coming to this extended stay hotel so we can meet them. They had a baby boy too -- and Todd really just wants to have something to compare Mercer to... to see how long these fingers and toes really are compared to another infant!

Mercer had his first pediatrician's visit this morning (the social worker set it up). The nurse measured him... 19" (she stretched him out & marked it on the paper that was on the table) -- but she said these measurements will be all over the place for awhile. Then, she took him to the station to be weighed. He put on a show! As Todd was taking his diaper off, he shot up a stream of pee about 2' high which went up & back over him onto the scale behind him. The nurse had a pretty chipper attitude as she was wiping down the scale with Windex. I'm sure it's not the first or last time that will happen! The measurement that they recorded was 6.3 lbs -- but in the photo, it clearly says 6.1. Don't know why the discrepancy?


The doctor inspected him and said that the area of the circumcision was healing very well and that his umbilical cord looks good too. (the dark piece of his cord will fall off, but he didn't say when. i don't know if I want to be around for that -- maybe that will be on Todd's shift ?!) All-in-all... a great bill of health so far. The doc said that the hospital records will be sent to their office. We haven't seen anything... so I hope we get a copy of them as well as the birth certificate, footprints, etc. We are supposed to see a pediatrician pretty much right when we get back to Atlanta too -- and will want to be able to transfer all of this stuff to them.


We went through a number of diapers and wipes while there b/c Mercer (or shall I call him my little "mustard dispenser" was going CONSTANTLY while the doc was checking him!) And here's a pic after Todd's dressed him and Mercer is content.






















Thursday, February 28, 2008

Chunky Mustard

[warning: some of the content of tonight's blog may not be suitable for those with weak stomaches]

I don't have much to blog about today except that we're either tired... or delusional... or have that halo effect that I've been reading about regarding newborns.

Reason I think "something's up" with us is because we are finding the silliest things hilarious about Mercer. ie: his HUGE LOUD BOOMING burps after he eats.... the shooting streams during diaper changes... and the chunky mustard being shot from his tiny little bum hole when we change his diaper. (we now have to watch it at both ends). I think I was reading that something to do with the "fresh air" of taking the diaper off stimulates his bowel function. I probably shouldn't talk about his poo (these will be great stories when he's 17 and wanting to take someone to the prom!) -- but the many stages of poo are quite fascinating.

For the past couple of days I've thought he is a little tiny play-dough factory... you know... you put it into a form and you squeeze it out into pasta noodle looking things? now, the color is quite bright yellow and the consistancy is more fluid but a little chunky... and it shoots out quick!

It's a challenge to get the diaper on and off quickly. To try to do it before he soils a clean diaper with the voracious force of a missle and/or before he shoots a stream of pee all over the diaper, his clothes, the blanket that we have down on the floor for his changes (yes - he misses the diaper pad that we change him on, of course)!


What did we do today? I got a nice work-out in at the hotel gym after breakfast. We retained an attorney early afternoon. We went to babies r us to buy a frame for the carseat & turn it into a stroller (may sound weird, but I think it's the "smallest footprint" option that we can do and which will work for the plane ride home / through the rest of his days in an infant car seat) Honestly some of this bothers me in terms of how much stuff you go through & then get rid of shortly after. As an added bonus with getting this frame thing - I think that it's less stuff to cart around / may actually be easier on us when we do take an infant carseat / stroller somewhere.

After that trip to the store, we continued into downtown Colorado Springs & wandered around (this is SO "us" as we love to check out the townscape of any city we visit). There's really nothing to post picture-wise except me in front of this cool metal and rock sculpture that I wanted to snap a shot of - but since this is Mercer's trip - we had to get him in the shot. He's in the baby sling (which is partially covered by a blanket). Sorry you can't see him; it was too chilly for us to take him out! But you can see the moutain range in the background. It's everywhere you look... beautiful!


Oh well, we'll try to do better tomorrow regarding photos.

Friday, we have a pediatrician appt at 8:15... I'm having a girl's afternoon with the birth mother around 2... and in between, we need to begin working on lodging for our "move" to Denver on Monday. Oh yeah - this was also just completed within the last hour: Todd's flight home on Wednesday was booked. : -( but, so was a flight for my amazing / stellar / terrific friend Susan to come out here on Wednesday. : - ) She's going to come out here to hang with Mercer and me... and to help out / help me get some zzzz's.

Enjoy that parting thought: chunky mustard. Boy these are the precious moments, huh? (and - as Mercer gets to be an adult... these bodily functions will definitely NOT be cute!)

c

pictures!

We did get some good shots today. Check them out!
We gave Mercer his first bath (well, for us. They gave him one at the hospital, but it was our first go at it.) He did so well. He was very attentive... and he didn't get upset like we thought he would. We gave him a sponge bath (b/c he still has his umbilical cord / we're not allowed to bathe him 'til it comes off -- eewwww!) He did cry, however, when we washed his hair - but that was at the very end of the bathing process per a step-by-step guide we were reading on how to bathe the little guy.


You can see how we're doing some things in an unconventional way... we don't have a proper place to bathe him, so we laid out waterproof pads on the blanket on the floor and got bowls of warm water (from the hotel kitchenette) in order to wash him. Todd had to keep running back and forth with new bowls of water b/c they didn't hold the warm temp for long. Todd likes this picture because it gives a good perspective on how small he is. No - I'm not hurting him... I am washing his chest. Notice how attentive he is. He was this way through most of the bath. I couldn't tell if he liked it / disliked it / or was just contemplating the whole event.


After the bath, we met the birthmother and social worker again for lunch and an outing to a nearby park called "Garden of the Gods." We did the stuff at the welcome center and then went for a drive through the actual park which consist of the rock formations in the background. Danielle said that she likes to hike -- and so do we -- so we made plans to come back when Mercer is older and hike around this park. It's a pretty place and would make a nice outing for a return visit.

We got to know her a bit better and we felt like we connected more with her on this visit. I am planning to have a "girl's outing" with her Friday afternoon and we're going to meet her and her father on Saturday.


Once we returned back to the hotel (after a shopping stop), we returned to find a fruit arrangement (looks like a flower arrangement, but is made of fresh fruit - yum) and a teddy bear that Todd's brothers and sister (and Mercer's cousins) sent. We couldn't resist a shot of him on our hotel room couch with the teddy bear because the bear is bigger than he is!

And... one final shot that we thought was cute... it kind of reminded us of that movie Christmas Story where the kid was so bundled up they couldn't move their arms. I found this great thick / plush / warm "bunting" (I think it's called) at a kid's consignment store and had to have it. He's really too small for it, but we put him in it anyways since we'd be walking around the park. Honestly, his arms are curled up inside of the gray suit... and his legs go about 2/3rds the way down. The device he's laying in is a snuggle nest co-sleeper. This is his make-shift crib. (yes - it's also on the blue multi-purpose blanket!) It was designed for putting in the bed with the parents, but Todd says he tosses & turns too much / he'd be afraid he'd squish him. Also - it's in the living room of our suite - which helps us sleep in shifts.


Tomorrow (Thursday), we don't have anything planned. We are excited to just "be" and bond as a family.


Candice

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

We met the birth mother today.



It's around1:30 am here (3:30 am back at home)... and it just dawned on me that we've only known Mercer for about 28 hours. We're beginning on day 2 for us (day 4 for him) -- and we're making it through so far!! We've had a request (per the comments on the last blog) to add more pictures. For some reason most of the ones we took on Tuesday were blurry, but I have one here to add that is pretty clear (except the hands and feet look like they're in motion as Mercer was rolling over). I think he felt a little "exposed" b/c we took off his gown and snapped a few shots with him in only his Onesie. I wanted to show the world how little he really is! Skinny little legs and arms (although you don't see them too often as he's still very curled up)... and those fingers and toes... yes, they are SO long! Someone said he could play piano or basketball with those long fingers. (Did I mention earlier that the birth father is 6'-10" ?!) Todd - thinking about baseball, of course - said he could make a good pitcher & really control the ball with those fingers. Oh - I envision hours upon hours of the two of them throwing a baseball around!

We'll try to get some better pics Wednesday and post them probably late Wednesday night!


We're not getting as freaked out by his every sound, every whimper, every sigh. We are growing into things a bit more. Per the reassuring emails and comments on the blog, I guess we're going things ok so far. Figuring out a lot of stuff as we go along b/c we didn't have a lot of time to read up on stuff before his arrival. I did sound a little nervous in last night, but we've been reading our baby's owner's manual throughout the day and we're getting more comfortable with things. Yes -- there's actually a book out there called the Baby Owner's Manual and it's hilarious!! The chapter we've read several times so far is "programming sleep mode." It's written like an owner's manual for a stereo or a computer or something and has funny diagrams.)


We went to lunch with the birth mother at a meeting facilitated by the social worker. She is very nice, but oh so quiet. The social worker (since she came to the adoption agency a day before her due date) hasn't gotten to know her like she normally does with other birth mothers -- so we all aren't sure if she's reserved normally or if she's just got a lot going on through her head. We both imagine that this is such an emotional time that the latter definitely is at play to some degree. She held the baby throughout most of the lunch. Todd told her all about our Cumberland Island trip, as she is interested in hiking and camping.

We talked about how willing we are to having an open adoption, as this was a big concern of hers and her dad's. We talked about coming out here for visits (I'm thrilled b/c I LOVE it out here!) and potentially even flying her out for Mercer's 1st birthday. She's never flown.... so we'll have to talk about that one a little bit more as it gets closer. We have another facilitated meeting with her, her dad, and her 6 year old brother. The social worker actually suggests that I meet with her by myself at some point too and try to get to know her a little more. The social worker says that she opens up a bit more one-on-one and this is probably something we need. (It sure is nice having a "guide" through this part!)


I sacked out for 3 hours (yay!) while Todd folded laundry, fed, and changed his diaper. Todd's crashing now during my "shift"... and after I blog, I'm going to try to catch a few more zzzzz's while Mercer is dozing. We learned yesterday about swaddling. Today we were reading up on monitoring poo. Wednesday I think we need to tackle grooming (give little M a sponge bath -- maybe wash his hair -- and *gulp* clip his nails... scared to death to do that one, but I just bought some clippers today with a magnifying glass on the end).

Catch ya later. Thanks again for everyone's support and love. It's really great hearing from you.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

A new morning....

Things are a lot different for us now! We spent our first night with Mercer. Amy, the social worker brought him to us at the hotel last night. She spent a couple of hours with us going through what has happened so far in his first couple of days, showing us what formula he uses & how to prepare it, how to change his diaper / clean his umbilical cord / take care of his little you-know-what b/c he was circumsized (sp?) yesterday.... and doing the paperwork requrired for us to take temporary possession of him during this period of time until things are finalized. What a job she has -- working all hours of the day / night. We were so grateful that she came to us so late (9ish CO time). I think by 11:30 -- Todd & I were "officially" on our own.



She said he was such a good baby... and he was. She was such a pro when he needed something, she could attend to him & keep him happy. I don't know that Todd & I are doing as good a job so far... but it's 5:15 here and he seems to be doing ok. He's not sleeping as solidly as we thought he would -- he wants to be comforted a lot throughout the night (and - heck - would you blame him?!) We laid him down once we were all settled in and we thought he would crash for a couple of hours, but he woke pretty quickly afterwards. We got up and fed him (he's on a 3hr schedule per Amy) and Todd took a turn sleeping while I held and comforted Mercer. After I got pretty sleepy, I laid him back down to see he would snooze a little, but he was a little fussy / Todd got up with him. All I know is a couple of hours later, I woke up and Todd has fed him, changed him, and re-swaddled him! I was so impressed... he's a pro at this already!



Here's one pic taken last night. We'll update with more today. We'll try to get an up-close shot w/ all of us. We are going to meet Danielle, the birth mother at some point today. (We thought the birth mother's name was Jenny, but that was someone at the agency....boy - Sunday afternoon and Monday getting here was so frantic and crazy, we mis-understood the name / we wanted to clear it up w/ those we had told her name to.)



We talked to so many people over the past day & a half and we are so thankful for all the love...so much love... that we've received from everyone. It is such a great feeling getting all of this encouragement and support. We have been bowled over. Seriously.



I have started something new: cry a little bit off and on b/c I'm happy. Not bawling, but tears welling up (and sometimes a little more) when I think about this gift.... when I read an email or listen to a voice mail.... when talking with some of you on the phone.... when looking down at Mercer's tiny little peaceful little face. I had never done that before until we got that call from Amy Sunday morning. thank you.



Candice



ps...Mercer is asleep in my left arm now as I'm typing. I'll need to check with Todd later to see if that's how he made it through those couple of hours while I was asleep. I'm afraid I'm going to spoil him right from the start, but oh how I hate to see his little face scrunch up and hear this little tiny but piercing high-pitch wimper! I'm already whipped, aren't I?

Sunday, February 24, 2008

The adoption update...

We met with our social worker today. She had actually finished our home study this morning, but we had to go in this afternoon & sign a few more things and take the packages with us... we have 4 packs of paper with 80 - 100 sheets of "stuff" in it for our COMPLETED home study. yay! That's a HUGE relief to have that document, for - without it - we would not be eligible to adopt.


Afterwards, we went to Babies-R-Us to return a few (yellow) gender neutral things (we had way too much yellow clothing!) and get some blue / boy clothes. While we were there, we got a call from the social worker in Colorado. Good thing we did b/c she informed us that he is tiny... she bought some preemie clothes and he is swimming in them. So - instead of buying a few extra 0-3 month sized clothes as planned, we got some preemie clothes!


Here are some details: He is 5 lbs 15 oz. 18" long. Healthy. Full head of hair. Eating a lot.
The birth mother signed the paperwork today rescending her parental rights. These papers cannot be filed until Friday morning, however, because of the laws in Colorado. After they have been filed on Friday -- they will take 2 - 3 weeks to process. (CO needs to do some stuff / send paperwork to GA / GA to do some stuff / send papers back to CO / CO to finalize the paperwork)


Once everything is finalized, we get the call that the baby can come back to Georgia with us. One of us must stay in the state the whole time with the baby... that will be me. Todd will stay a week (or hopefully more if he can manage with work). We are flying out Monday afternoon -- and -- if we get there early enough, we will pick the baby up Monday night. If not, we'll pick him up Tuesday morning / bring him back to the hotel with us. He will be in the care of the social worker Monday once he's discharged from the hospital instead of going into state care. She's been really great so far. We're looking forward to meeting her, the birth mother Jenny... and the baby boy -- who we plan to name Mercer. Mercer Groves. (Haven't settled on a middle name yet, but we've always liked the name Mercer.)
I think that's about all we have right now. We'll update as things progress.


It's all so quick, but we're ready. I'm doing lots of laundry... Todd's printing out some additional photographs to include with the home study and making lodging arrangements. Both of us will need to figure out what to do with work. We've called our employers and they all know -- but we still need to tie up some loose ends before we go.


c

We were chosen, but.....

the social worker who is working with the birth mother is being cautious because all of this has happened so last-minute and so quickly.

Supposedly the birthmother (located south of Colorado Springs, CO) was working with a friend of the family to do a private adoption and it fell through. She called an agency in Colorado on Friday who then called our consultant and asked if there were any families she was working with that would be a good fit. They called us at 4:45 Friday afternoon... we said - sure! - send the book. The social worker in Colorado called us on Saturday afternoon saying that the birth mother was in labor and that she was taking the profile books to her to review. She said she would call us with the birthmother's decision.

We got a call this morning that said we were chosen... and the baby was born yesterday. He is 5 lbs 15 oz. (We don't really have any more details other than that at this point.)

The social worker is heading back to the hospital to hang out with the birth mother a little bit more. The reason she's being cautious is b/c the birthmother wasn't 100% positive that she could go through with it -- although she felt pretty sure she could. The social worker wants us to wait 'til after this meeting at the hospital today before making our flight arrangements.

We've begun washing all of the baby gear that we've collected. We're meeting with our social worker this afternoon at 3 (yes - she's meeting us on a Sunday! She actually was working on our homestudy report this morning & said she finished it today. cool!). Afterwards, we're going to babies r us to return a few gender-neutral clothes and to pick up some sterilization bags (if they sell them) so that we don't have to buy and pack a bottle sterilizer on the plane. (We picked up a car seat from a friend last night... that was the 2nd to last thing I wanted to put in the ready-GO kit.) The only other thing I think that I want for the kit is a baby sling. I have been reading about baby wearing (how good it is for both the baby and mother)... and - maybe one of those frames that a car seat snaps into so that you don't have to get a big bulky stroller. Tomorrow morning at 8, we're signing all of the papers at a bank to switch over our Home Equity Line (we recieved word on Saturday (in an email sent Friday) that it was ready to go). This will be our financing mechanism for the adoption. Sounds like everything is falling into place.

Funny thing at yoga yesterday... I was talking to my teacher about yoga on the beach, about how relaxed I was, about our call Friday afternoon. She thought that I "knew" something b/c I was so calm. She could feel it. And - Todd & I went to a work party at my office (there were about 20 volunteers there trying to do some things to finish the building so it would be ready for our conference in March).... we actually got the call while we were working there Saturday afternoon about taking our profile book for review. We got such great comments from all of our co-workers too. They all hoped that this one would work out for us.... and I got to say "bye" to a number of them just-in-case. The phrase we were all using: "I hope I don't see you Monday." (meaning -- hopefully we'd be on a plane to Colorado!)

I should go for now. I'll update the blog when we hear more.